ITS ALIVE!!!!!! and just in time for spring

today was a beautiful day out... me and my dad work on my car.... and it is close to completion... it runs great... all we really need is a new battery, and replace the radiater... we got a good radiater, but its the wrong make of it.. we found out today... the one we're supposed to have has a transmission coolent... the one thats on the celica right now doesnt have that.... we can drive it but not for long distances... then we're going to look for better fenders... we can use the ones we got but ones a bit rusted so we got to rig it up to work... we cut off a peice of another fender and was going to cut off the rusted part and weld the 2 peices together... it would work but we want to see if we can find better fenders for cheep... if we cant find it then we'll manage...... but really most of the technical stuff is fixed.. all thats left is the cosmetic work which i could actually do some myself with out help........ though what was funny... when we test drove it, we drove it down fay rd and there was no body on the front... (no bumpers, fenders, hood, lights, any of that stuff... just the engine and body....) we're driving down fay rd with the top down and some people are just giving us some weird looks... cus all you see of the front is the engine and the main frame of the car.... but what i'm very happy about is it WORKS!!!!!! and runs pretty good so far... its alive... its got brought back from its chrunched up grave that i put it in.... so hopefully i should be able to drive it to prom... which i was hoping for that..... yay... ok im done talking about my car...

wow i sound illiterate.. lol

i reread some of my blogs and noticed that theres a lot of grammer and spelling errors.... while reading some sentences it sound like i have the knowledge of writing like that of an elementary student... maybe it might help if i would reread my posts before i even post them... that way i could fix anything thats wrong... that would be the logical thing to do... ok im out... mother called and its hard to talk and write at the same time

the registers at meijer dont work too well

today is the second time i was caught with the alarm going off at the door.... i bougt cd... and as you know there's magnetic strips in there (to prevent people from stealing them)... well when you run them through the reg its supposed to un-magnetise them... but the past two times ive went through there... they didnt get unmagnetised and the alarm went off when i went through the doors... i felt like an idiot.... the first time i got the incredibles cd, and a 50's music mix... and that was like last saterday or something.... then today i bought 4 cd's for $60... not to bad considering i got 7 cd's total... a set of 3 80's mixes, the greese soundtrack, green day, and a whitesnake collection which has 2 cd's... i think the whitesnake cd costed the most... it was around $22....well im out

what the hell is going on in my head

i hate my mind sometimes... my thoughts.... pictures that form in my mind.... sometimes they drive me insane... its crazy.... the voices... it's like a war within myself and i'm in the middle of it....

yesterday i was at work and for some reason i got pissed off...i dont even know why i was pissed off... which actually kinda scared me... cus i dont really ever remember a time when i didnt know WHY i'm pissed was off, cus i normally know why im pissed off... i just dont tell people.... when they ask whats wrong i tell them nothing.... but yesterday i purely had no idea why i was pissed off. i was just ticked....

then today why mind wondered and depressed me..... i was happy and fine the first half of work (but just bored) and then the last half after my thoughts start to take over i was depressed and miserable... why the hell does my mind fuck me up so much..... i dont know.....it plays tricks on me.... hides feelings from me... make me feel like shit...

it's late, theres a beautiful full moon out there and its easter

i just got home... i worked a 4 to 9 shift at work and afterwards i went with corey and dave to coreys house and buffalo wild wings... right now its 2 in the morning.... and happy easter.... yay.... if your religous, have a good day celebrating the reserection of christ... if you not hope you get alot of chocolate from the easter bunny.....well i'm going to sleep now... cus i got to get up somewhat early in the morning... cus i got to be at work at 11:00... yay

my first day on spring break yay

i got to sleep in... i think i got up at around ten... that was fun... i actually didnt do much.... i went to the store to pick up supplies for my march maddness project... i'm going to spray paint my poster... and i'm thinking about with the left over gold paint, i'm going to put some little decale on my car.... i also got a new cd and i bought the incredibles dvd... it's a good movie... i just now got finished watching it... the cd i bought was a 3 in one disc deal one 50's music... so far it doesnt seem that good. but theres a couple of good songs... like At The Hop and Rockin Robin... though one thing im suprised is that the song quality is actually pretty good, normally with these type of cd's the actual quality of the music is horrible... though while there i seen victoria schattuar (i cant quite remember how to spell her last name, i used to know), i said hey...

at around 4 i went to work... we got 2 new people as far as i know... a guy named jimmy, and a girl name kimberly? (i think that was her name)... she was pretty cute..lol....i saw a couple of people at work from school... i seen amanda smith and whitney something (forgot last name) come in together... then justin boone came in about 20 minutes later... also i found out that holly buring work at steak & shake... i got a split shake when i went to the store... banana and strawberry...

now its about 12:30 at night and i'm debating on whether to just go to bed or play diablo........ oh yea... i got off work early today... i was supposed to close which means i probably would be at work for another hour or a hour and a half... my manager just let me go home cus they had to good closers and jimmy who was learning how to close.... and plus most of the preclose was already done.... i'd already filtered the friers and closed down half the sandwich station.... and cleaned the frier bottoms when i left.... when i left the fry station was getting closed down and the grills where cleaned... sarah came in for some reason and cleaned the dinning room... so they were good....

well i think i'm going to play diablo, cus glenns watching the movie D&D (dungons and dragons) and its turned up pretty losd... so im out

my stomach feels funny... lol

i know the titles stupid... it sounds like i'm a little toddler or something... i just couldnt think of anything else to title this....

though for some reason lately almost every time i eat something i feel like i need to throw up....i dont really know why though...its just right when i eat, its like i got indigestion or something... and once i did throw up, as mentioned in an earlier post... it really kind of sucks cus its making me not want to eat that much... and i hope it doesnt last... cus proms coming up and i'd hate for something to happen like what happened at homecoming this year... i walked in the doors of the school and the first place i visited was the restroom and the trash can.... i threw up, and after a minute or so i cleaned myself up... later on that night, i started to dance with one of my friends, and in the middle of our dance i began to feel queasy and had to leave in the middle of the dance and head to the restroom again... i felt pretty bad... but i was glad that i didnt get anything on anyone... deffinatly her, cus she looked so pretty and the dress she wore was so cool.. (a blue dragon chinese dress, it was sweet looking, she looked so sexy in it) ((and i know you'll probably read this, but i'm not sure what you'll think of it though)) but yea... i dont want something like that to happen again... cus that just sucked...

well im out of things to say... my mind went blank... and it doesnt help that my brother is watching a movie that has some rap music playing like every 5 minutes of it, and its turned up quite loud... so i cant think.... so im out

dont touch me when i'm pissed or stressed out...please

today was long... it had some fun times and some bad times, but over all i think it was a success (if your clueless what went on it was fine arts night, but i dont think anyone reads this other then a couple of people and they know what went on this night). but some of the more stressful times i'm not that proud of...well mainly mine... i was stressing out because i couldnt find me robe and rachel came over to help me and give confort...she took hold of my arm (as a friendly gesture to help)... i flipped, scared her... when i flipped im not sure on how close i was but it almost looked like i was close to hitting her, but i didnt, thank god.... when i'm stressed people, please DONT touch me, for god sakes, dont touch me... i flip out almost immediatly, and most of the time i'm not even aware of it till i've already flipped out... i dont trust myself when i get like that...and i hate that side of me, i want to kill it... last time something like this happened, it was the day i was really pissed off (the day i wrote all those free write poems, mostly about hatred) my friends tried to comfort me and figure out what was wrong, and during lunch katie came to give me a hug, i didnt know that she was there cus she came up behind me and i wasnt really aware of many of my surroundings that day... like the split second that she touched me i was turned around and was ready to punch... then i realised who it was and stopped... it scared the shit out of the whole table... i think it was miles who said he never seen me move that fast... that day some of my friends learned that when im pissed, leave me alone...

i'm not proud of this side of me, and i want to kill it... i hate it but its me.... im not always the goofy, dumb phyl you some people know me to be.... i can be a real monster sometimes...and i'm aware of that side of me... i just cant control it fully...though i think thus far i've never physically hurt someone when i get like this.... just scared the shit out of them... i can normally control some of it and restrain myself from hurting people....well physically hurting them, i 'm sure i hurt their feelings when i do it...

man i felt like shit after it happened.... sry rachel... i know i already said it a few times.....well im tired, its late, its been a long day, and there's school tomarrow.... i'm gone

i'm going against my morals

i was always told that alcohol was bad for you, and you shouldnt drink it... that its a dangerous drug,that will get you nothing good from it.... its a waste of time and money... that it'd be better to just burn you money.... and i believed it... for most of my life and even now i think alcohol is "bad", and i dont like it... but lately i've been using whiskey every once in a while... i've used it four times... the first time was i mixed a shot of whiskey with orange juice, ew dont try that, its nasty...i dont that cus im told whiskey helps your voice if its dead... i didnt see any effects on my voice.... the next two times i mixed it with apple juice, and that was actually pretty good... the 2nd time i put cinnamin in with it, it tasted like apple cider. the forth time was just yesterday, i made some spaghetti and i cooked the meat in a shot of whiskey... then poured in the sauce and all that stuff, and it was really good....i cant really take to much credit for the sauce though cus it was a pre-made sauce... but normally when i make spaghetti i make it from scratch.... a lb. of meat, two cans of hunts tomato sauce, a can of tomato paste if available, maybe a can of beans (but i dont really care for kidney beans), then all the spices... it normally comes out good. then cook the noddles in water with olive oil and italian seasoning in the water....

wow i got off track from the main subject...but i think i made my point clear... i'm starting to use whiskey and its going against my morals...

the time on my computers screw up...

i dont really know but for some reason when i post comments and post logs on these blogs it says that im doing it 3 hours before i actually do it... i mean its around 10:20 right now and i bet it will say that this blog was published at aroun 7:20... its just the same way with the comments. the actual time on the computer says 10:20, but for some reason it just has the hours like 3 hours behind... like im in california or something..... like in the pacific time zone (least i think that was the name of that one... cant really remember though....)

its just wierd

i had a rollar coaster of a day...

my day started out fine... somewhat, but once i got to school i got a little depressed for a hour or so... before the classed started because of the 2 hour delay... then class starts and things start to look up... i hang out with my friends and i get in a happier mood... oh i also finished the cadence i was composing today... still dont know exactly how it sounds all together... need one of those nifty computer composer programs... my day goes great for most of the remander of the day until about 8:00 when i'm at work and my co-worker really pissed me off... i got sent home an hour earlier than i was originaly sceduled off, and when i get home... i puked what dinner i did eat (2 jr. cheese deluxes, and by the way that stuff does not look pretty when it comes back up...and doesnt taste real great either)... so after being on the internet for about 20 to 30 minutes i start to feel better and like yay... goofy hyper... idiotic... lol... so yea.. there's my ups and downs of today... im on my own little rollar coaster, but then again i normally am on one... p.s. sorry if i grossed anyone out with my simi-descriptive meeting with the toilet...

the concert was fun (revised addition)

i acidently published the last one without writing anything in it... opps... well the concert turned out to be fun... i mess up a little but i dont think it was that much noticed... but one thing that did suck was my legs were going numb for standing in one spot for so long, and for some reason before the concert started my foot started to hurt... when ever i bent it (basically walked) a sharp pain went through my foot... and i hobbled a bit... i think i pulled a muscle or something... i dont know.... though it wasnt a big concert... it was a little one, just the youth concert, in a small church.... and the church was right next to my old church, in clifton... the St. Johns unitarian church was the one we sang at... my old church was the seventh-day adventists church right done the street...

id like to say that the soloists who sang at the concert were freakin awsome... and thats an understatement...they sounded great and they done their songs by memory... they were all foreign languages too... it was just awsome...

ok im done

the concert was fun

capital was cool

even though the only building i was in was the conservatory of music, (because since of the cold i didnt take the whole tour of the campus...) i was still impressed with capital... i will go back up there probably over the summer or during spring to get a full tour or something... maybe get a couple of friends and have like a whole day thing up in columbus... see the university in the morning and take in the city sites in the evening or something.... i am most defenatly going to apply there, but ill have to find scholarships, considering the tuition is about 22,000 and room and board i think was around 6,000..... one thing that i found out up there... i noticed 2 ice cream palors on main street... and there was 2 wendy's too.....

i was actually suprised, when it came to Q & A time... like none of the students asked question, it was mostly the parents... i asked like i think it was around 4 or 5 questions total... only like one other student asked a question...(and i might add she was pretty hot... lol.... a junior too).

i got my first concert with mayfest tomorrow... thats going to be fun, and kinda suck at the same time... cus my voice is dead.... its been dead now for about a week and a half... so im probably going to crack and squeak on a couple of notes.... then my voice will just cut out on others.... it'll be fun... oh oh oh and if i get lost on the way down to the church that we're singing at... i get to blame rachel... her co-workers gave me permission...lol... so its all rachels fault if i get lost...

well thats all... the happenings in my life isnt that exciting...

yay... i get to have more than 3 hours of sleep today!!!! woo hoo

yea i was supposed to close today at work... so that meant getting off work from about 1:30 to 2:30, and i am getting up tomarrow at five... so im happy.... now ill get about 6 hours of sleep... which i can function on that much sleep...

also today.... we get celebrities too, (ha sarah your not the only one who gets to see celebrity look alikes)... we had wayne brady come to wendy's....(or at least a guy who looked like him).... and there was 6 people from our school that i knew that came... leah,another chick who i forgot her name, deborah, tia, ashley, and a sophomore who i forgot her name...the rest of the people were people in our class (class of 2006)...

well my brain just went blank.... so i guess this is all...

i have reached Nivana...

something very freaky happened to me in latin today... i dont know why it happened but it just did out of the blue...we were going over a worksheet in latin and all the sudden this thought popped in my head... it was like i have just reached enlightenment... (hence the Nirvava title) ... all the sudden i knew that i wanted to become a choral director. i dont know why it just popped in my head but i just felt kinda light headed and was like wow. it was like i just answered the age old question which came first the chicken or the egg... when it popped in my head i rushed for a piece of paper to right it down, because i was likely to forget... but as i was writing, it was like my hand was controlled by something else... other than my hand.... cus i wasnt really comprehending what exactly i was writing until i was done and reread it.... it was just a very wierd feeling... ok im going to stop now cus it sounds like i was possesed or something...

hey im just full of topics today

rehersal went well.. except my voice wasnt working to well... at rehersal all the parts had to mix up, so i had a soprano on my left and an alto on my right...gladly there was a strong bass about 2 seats down to my left, that i could hear my part from... so i down fairly well considering the condition of my voice... i also found out i dont have another song that i need... yay, i wont be able to practice it cus i dont got it... so ill get it and try to sight sing it the day of the concert, which mind you is going to be very difficult... i tried to do it today and man was it hard... the other songs i can somewhat sight/hear sing my parts... but this one was kinda fast and crazy...lots of 8th notes in i think is was 3/4 time.... then it switches to 6/8 time and blows you mind... so its fun... the song was called modern music...

one good thing today was that i didnt get lost in hyde park like i did last week... well i didnt really get lost but just really turned around... but today i seen what i did wrong. and i got to the church with no problems...actually me and ashley were the first one there...
on the way home i acidently took the wards corner exit off the highway ( the one before the blanchester/milford exit)... once i realised what i did i was like dang it... then i decided to take a new way home instead of turning right where that one spa place is (which takes you to milford) i kept going straight... i knew somewhere that way lead you to loveland but i wasnt exactly sure if you needed to turn anywhere.... it ended up being a straight run to loveland... so i now know another way to get to wards corner... which might actually be faster because of the traffic on 28...

on a completely different note... when i got home i decided to get some apple juice... but i put whiskey in it.... cus its good for your throut... i thought it would be real nasty, cus when its mixed with oj its nasty (trust me), and plus it smells nasty... but when i added it to apple juice it actually wasnt that bad.... kinda good... i put in half a shot of whiskey and top the cup off in apple juice, and it tasted almost like an apple cider... it was alright.....

a 2nd puberty? lol

this was pretty funny, but it also kinda was pissing me off. all day yesterday it was like i was hitting puberty all over again cus my voice was all over the place... i was squeaking almost every time i talked.... and thats because my voice is jacked right now...i killed it on thursday... and its not been working that well since then... when i've been trying to sing it sounds like crap and it sounds like im tone deaf.thats whats been ticking me off.... cus i got a chorus rehersal in 2 hours... and my voice still sounds like crap... im going to drink some tea, and take this throut spray stuff that glenn gave me. the spray tastes like crap but it makes your throut feel good... i think its some echinaca... (thats spelled wrong)... but the whole funny concept of this whole thing is it feels like i hit puberty again...

p.s.- with that note i could say something very wrong about this but i wont... inless a reader is interested....( ill say a hint... its very perverted) lol

hey im alive still... i didnt die off...lol

i say that in the title cus the last post i done was on christmas which is like about 3 months ago.....

guessm what a funny thing happened at work yesterday, some guy came in through drive thru and ordered like a 30 dollar order... and then came up to the window and asked if we took monopoly money.... then drove off... so for the next 20 minutes we had to memorize all the orders and we couldnt ring in the orders because we had to make up the money.... also last night at work i worked front register for about 40 minutes... i've never technically ran reg ( reg is short for register, if you didnt know) before... i've rang in a couple of orders before but i never was on that position... my manager asked me if i knew reg and i was like i know the main stuff... you find the button and press it... but i dont know how to do all the special stuff, like modifying orders, multi orders, and so on... so my manager put me on there and said ill take the crash course training...lol which was kinda funny... when ever i didnt know someting i was like "sheral (i dont know how to spell her name.) how do you do this"... but whats kinda funny about this is shes the manager who actually keeps training me on the different positions... shes the one who started me on sandwiches... and i think she also was the one who started to train me on cordinating.

well to end this post i will do a questionair that i got from a friend... i posted on her blog and by her rules i now have to post this on mine so here it is...

stolen from ~sarah b... who in turn stole it from UnlivableSquire

Ask me 4 questions.
Any 4, no matter how personal, private or random.
I have to answer them honestly. I have to answer them all.
In turn, you post this message in your own journal and you have to answer the questions that are asked to you.
change the name of where you got this, to the person you got this from if you take the challenge